“And if today all you did was hold yourself together, I’m proud of you.” – Unknown
What do you do when your day takes an unexpected turn? Is it wrong to feel sad? Is it a feeling of “just pick yourself up and dust yourself off?”
We all face hard days, and I want to say that if you are in one now and you have held yourself together, I am proud of you. BUT if you didn’t hold yourself together, if you fell apart and cried, if you yelled at your friends or family, or felt despair, you are not alone. I am proud of you for making it through this day.
Why do we feel that we need to patch ourselves up and put on a pretty bow to show everyone around us that life is great? Why are we lying when someone asks us, “Are you okay?” and we say Yes, I’m fine? Why do we push all of those negative feelings down inside and not share them with our closest friends? What are we afraid of?
Vulnerability is raw and rare. We try to shape people to act like us by having them conform to a behavior that we deem acceptable. Why is that?
For myself, naturally, I don’t like it when someone is sad or angry or hurt. I want to fix it, ignore it, or change it. I forget that the person who is vulnerable at that moment is being raw, and I am not the one who can change their heart. That is not my job.
Sometimes we need to let people be. Let them sit in their sorrow, let them sit in their anger, and allow them to feel all of their emotions. Let them be vulnerable. It is a privilege that we get to experience this side of them. After all, people want to be heard and seen. It could be that they want you to just listen.
Today was one of these moments for me. It was a rough day, and I chose in my vulnerability to reach out to some friends and share my saddened heart. Each one of those friends brought a different way of encouragement, offering me a space to be myself and to hear my heart. There was deep appreciation for a friend who reached out and asked me how I was doing, and I was able to say, God is good, but my heart is sad. I was grateful in that moment that I could share my raw feelings,, only to have my friend respond as if I were her sister. With love and understanding. I couldn’t ask for better friends.
It’s ok not to be ok. Process your pain, allow it to show you your heart, take it to God, and give Him your raw burdens. He is the one who can shoulder that weight. Then rest, knowing that tomorrow brings another sunrise, another day of fresh air, and another chance to live in the fullness of the life that has been given to you.
You are valuable, you are worth it, and what you are in this moment is enough. My prayers are with you as you see the rawness of your heart, and may God give you the restoration that you need.
